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December 12, 2012
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This color was way too posh for some cartoony design.  What you’ve got here is two coats of Deborah Lippmann’s Through The Fire, a deep burgundy red with a fabulous ruby shimmer to it.  It went on a bit darker (in indirect light — it goes crazy in the sun) than I would have thought given what you can see in the bottle so I had to switch gears design-wise and settled on adding some gold swoops with a few rhinestone accents for effect.  Simple and non-obnoxious wow for the holidays!

Christmas nails

Deborah Lippmann Through The Fire

Christmas nail art

holiday nails

holiday nail art

…and a quick note/thought on the language we use:

Had a great conversation yesterday with one of my old women’s group members about the use of “girl” vs. “woman” that I think speaks to the way a lot of us refer to ourselves and each other. Think about it for a second: how many times have you called yourself or someone you know a girl recently? And are you/were they out of high school?

It’s an easy throwaway word in our collective vernacular — it’s cute and friendly, non-threatening and precious…. and usually incorrectly used. Even Webster is hip to it:

girl
1. a female child, from birth to full growth.
2. a young, immature woman, especially formerly, an unmarried one.
3. a daughter: My wife and I have two girls.
4. Informal: Sometimes Offensive. a grown woman, especially when referred to familiarly: She’s having the girls over for bridge next week.
5. girlfriend; sweetheart.

woman
1. the female human being ( distinguished from man ).
2. an adult female person.
3. a female attendant to a lady of rank.
4. a wife.
5. the nature, characteristics, or feelings often attributed to women; womanliness.

So why do we call ourselves girls, or let others call out to us like a child? It’s poor conditioning. It’s widely used. It’s a sexist, socially-acceptable way of subconsciously demoting our gender. Men would wince if you called them “boy” and quickly correct you to use “man” — we should insist on the same respect for and of ourselves.

I haven’t been a child for a long time, and have earned my stripes as a strong, independent and capable woman. I bet you have too. I’m not a girl, I’m a woman.

Here’s a great article on point from The Wake Magazine, and a video from Ignite NYC (speaks to women in the tech sector but definitely applies more broadly):

“If you want to be respected in tech as a woman, don’t call yourself a girl. See if we start referring to all the women who work in tech as women then we will have a lot more women when we get rid of the girls. And when I say women I mean people who menstruate and pay taxes.” — Caroline Drucker

6 Responses

  1. gottwinkies says:

    Woops…did I do this in a comment? If so, I apologize!

  2. Isabelle says:

    Hi, I’ve been lurking on this blog for

  3. admin says:

    Oh gosh, not at all! F’realz, not singling anybody out or being a jerk about friendly banter (“girl talk, girl’s night, hey gurrrrrrl” — I’m not the language police!). I mean, we call everybody darlin’ down here, that’s about as familiar and unprofessional as it gets… but in some settings, appropriate and totally okay (plus, you know, not gender-specific). The larger irk that got the ball rolling was junk like “the girl at the front desk” and referring to someone as “that girl” when obviously the people in question were 30-something women.

    This was just borne of a conversation with a friend the other day about how language is used and what harm can be done, that then splintered into several other conversations on topic. And each of us had our “duh/oh yeah” moments in it, so I figured I’d pass on the thoughts and maybe it would spark similar conversations and resolves elsewhere! My friend already included some of it in her management communications at work and I think that’s awesome — it’s important that we get recognized and referred to as adult and capable women, especially in professional settings but certainly even socially, and have the presence of mind to see ourselves in that light.

    • Gottwinkies says:

      Totally got ya on the language in the workplace bit-we’ve had it at our office, too…my pet peeve to hear even customers do that (unless they are a sweet old man that calls everyone dear, hon and ya know…). My Mom raised me that we are ladies, lol…even though I was not remotely ladylike, lol…I will definitely remember that men are Never referred to as Boys, so why should ladies be referred to as “girls”?! good reality check!Thanks dear!!

  4. Helga says:

    This mani is really pretty. And I like you even more with this text at the bottom :) I refer to myself as a girl but in swedish we have to words for that. “Flicka” is really a child. I wouldn’t call myself that in a serious manner. The other word “tjej” is a bit more grown up. So if I refer to people as girl, that’s the word I have in my head. Anyways, I don’t really see myself as a grown up (I’m 24). I’m guessing it has something to do with being the youngest of 4 :P But I think about these things. Like in the song Neanderthal man “I’m a neanderthal man, you’re a neanderthal girl” sheesh.
    Wow, what a rant! ;)

  5. finished10dnails says:

    Wow, this mani is stunning!

    And yah, you are correct about the terms. I work with a lot of retired men and it’s been interesting to hear how they refer to me and other women. I don’t have a problem correcting them (I don’t do “honey” if you aren’t related to me!) but it does make for some interesting thinking.

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